PMH Tool 5 – The Think-Feel-Do Thermostat Model

A picture is worth a thousand words. The Think-Feel-Do Thermostat Model is a simple but effective visual to help people see:

  • Where they are emotionally and behaviorally at any given moment
  • The cognitive (thought) reasons they are where they are
  • Where they might want to be emotionally and behaviorally instead
  • What it will take cognitively (thinking wise) to get there

The FEEL (emotional) Thermostat

  • The emotions in the diagram below are quantitatively and qualitatively different.
  • In determining the functionality of emotions, we always look at the frequency, intensity and duration of emotions. We can range from a low FID to a high FID
  • People can be CALM, feel CONCERN or experience ANXIETY
  • They can be CALM, feel FRUSTRATION, IRRITATION and ANNOYANCE, or experience ANGER
  • They can be CALM, feel SADNESS, or experience DEPRESSION
  • They can be CALM or indifferent, feel REGRET and REMORSE, or experience SHAME and GUILT
High FID

ANXIETY

Low FID

High FID

ANGER

Low FID

High FID

DEPRESSION

Low FID

High FID

SHAME, GUILT

Low FID

High FID

 

CONCERN

 

Low FID

High FID

FRUSTRATION

IRRITATION

ANNOYANCE

Low FID

High FID

 

SADNESS

 

Low FID

High FID

 

REGRET. REMORSE

 

Low FID

Low FID

CALM

High FID

Low FID

CALM

High FID

Low FID

CALM

High FID

Low FID

CALM

High FID

The FEEL – DO (behavioral) Thermostat Model

  • Responsible (response-able) means being able to RESPOND to life situations and challenges in the best possible way, a way that makes life better for all concerned
  • If we have little emotion or energy to move, we are not motivated to act
  • As our FEEL (emotional) thermostat goes up, we are increasingly likely to REACT to life events rather than RESPOND to the in the best possible way.
  • There are two ways to make a situation you don’t like worse, DO NOTHING and OVERREACT to it. People too often do the latter.

——————————  FEEL  ———————————————  ———  DO ———

ANXIETY ANGER DEPRESSION SHAME

GUILT

OVERREACT

REACT

 

CONCERN

 

FRUSTRATION

IRRITATION

ANNOYANCE

SADNESS REGRET

REMORSE

RESPOND
CALM CALM CALM CALM DO NOTHING
  • DEPRESSION, SHAME and GUILT may not seem like energy to move, but they have the same effect on behavior that ANXIETY and ANGER do – they cause people to be more REACTIVE and makes them less RESPONSE-ABLE

The THINK (cognitive) Thermostat

  • We can NOT CARE about something, WANT, PREFER or DESIRE it, or think we NEED it, it’s a NECESSITY, and DEMAND it
  • We can NOT CARE about something, think it’s UNPLEASANT, INCONVENIENT or UNCOMFORTABLE to some degree, or think it’s AWFUL
  • We can NOT CARE about something, NOT LIKE IT, or think we CAN’T STAND IT
  • We can NOT CARE about someone else’s or our own behavior, DISLIKE THE BEHAVIOR, or LABEL AND DAMN THE PERSON
  • For each philosophical position we can range from “sort of” to “really”

———————————————–  Think —————————————————-

Really

NEED

NECESSITY

DEMAND

Sort of

Really

 

AWFUL

 

Sort of

Really

CAN’T

STAND

IT

Sort of

Really

LABEL AND

DAMN

THE PERSON

Sort of

Really

WANT

PREFER

DESIRE

Sort of

Really

UNPLEASANT

INCONVENIENT

UNCOMFORTABLE

Sort of

Really

DON’T

LIKE

IT

Sort of

Really

DISLIKE

THE

BEHAVIOR

Sort of

Sort of

DON’T CARE

Really

Sort of

DON’T CARE

Really

Sort of

DON’T CARE

Really

Sort of

DON’T CARE

Really

The Think-Feel-Do Thermostat Model

NEED

NECESSITY

DEMAND

AWFUL CAN’T

STAND

IT

LABEL AND

DAMN THE

PERSON

ANGER OVERREACT

REACT

WANT

PREFERENCE

DESIRE

UNPLEASANT

INCONVENIENT

UNCOMFORTABLE

DON’T

LIKE

IT

DISLIKE

THE

BEHAVIOR

FRUSTRATION

IRRITATION

ANNOYANCE

RESPOND
DON’T CARE DON’T CARE DON’T CARE DON’T CARE CALM DO NOTHING

 

NEED

NECESSITY

DEMAND

AWFUL CAN’T

STAND

IT

LABEL AND

DAMN THE

PERSON

ANXIETY OVERREACT

 

REACT

WANT

PREFERENCE

DESIRE

UNPLEASANT

INCONVENIENT

UNCOMFORTABLE

DON’T

LIKE

IT

DISLIKE

THE

BEHAVIOR

CONCERN RESPOND
 

DON’T CARE

 

DON’T CARE DON’T CARE DON’T CARE CALM DO NOTHING

 

 

NEED

NECESSITY

DEMAND

AWFUL CAN’T

STAND

IT

LABEL AND

DAMN THE

PERSON

DEPRESSION OVERREACT

 

REACT

WANT

PREFERENCE

DESIRE

UNPLEASANT

INCONVENIENT

UNCOMFORTABLE

DON’T

LIKE

IT

DISLIKE

THE

BEHAVIOR

SADNESS RESPOND
 

DON’T CARE

 

DON’T CARE DON’T CARE DON’T CARE CALM DO NOTHING

 

NEED

NECESSITY

DEMAND

AWFUL CAN’T

STAND

IT

LABEL AND

DAMN THE

PERSON

SHAME

 

GUILT

OVERREACT

 

REACT

WANT

PREFERENCE

DESIRE

UNPLEASANT

INCONVENIENT

UNCOMFORTABLE

DON’T

LIKE

IT

DISLIKE

THE

BEHAVIOR

REGRET

 

REMORSE

RESPOND
 

DON’T CARE

 

DON’T CARE DON’T CARE DON’T CARE CALM DO NOTHING

 

Key Points

  • We have more control over our FEEL and DO thermostats than we realize
  • The key to getting control over our FEEL and DO thermostats is learning to control our THINK thermostats
  • Becoming AWARE of and ACCEPTING where we are cognitively is the first step
  • Taking ACTION to set our Think thermostat where we want them to be is the next step

 

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