PMH Tool 5 – The Think-Feel-Do Thermostat Model

A picture is worth a thousand words. The Think-Feel-Do Thermostat Model is a simple but effective visual to help people see:

• Where they are emotionally and behaviorally at any given moment
• The cognitive (thought) reasons they are where they are
• Where they might want to be emotionally and behaviorally instead
• What it will take cognitively (thinking wise) to get there

The FEEL (emotional) Thermostat

• The emotions in the diagram below are quantitatively and qualitatively different.
• In determining the functionality of emotions, we always look at the frequency, intensity and duration of emotions. We can range from a low FID to a high FID
• People can be CALM, feel CONCERN or experience ANXIETY
• They can be CALM, feel FRUSTRATION, IRRITATION and ANNOYANCE, or experience ANGER
• They can be CALM, feel SADNESS, or experience DEPRESSION
• They can be CALM or indifferent, feel REGRET and REMORSE, or experience SHAME and GUILT

High FID ANXIETY Low FID	High FID ANGER Low FID	High FID DEPRESSION Low FID	High FID SHAME, GUILT Low FID
High FID   CONCERN   Low FID	High FID FRUSTRATION IRRITATION ANNOYANCE Low FID	High FID   SADNESS   Low FID	High FID   REGRET. REMORSE   Low FID
Low FID CALM High FID	Low FID CALM High FID	Low FID CALM High FID	Low FID CALM High FID

The FEEL – DO (behavioral) Thermostat Model

• Responsible (response-able) means being able to RESPOND to life situations and challenges in the best possible way, a way that makes life better for all concerned
• If we have little emotion or energy to move, we are not motivated to act
• As our FEEL (emotional) thermostat goes up, we are increasingly likely to REACT to life events rather than RESPOND to the in the best possible way.
• There are two ways to make a situation you don’t like worse, DO NOTHING and OVERREACT to it. People too often do the latter.

——————————  FEEL  ———————————————  ———  DO ———

ANXIETY	ANGER	DEPRESSION	SHAME GUILT	OVERREACT REACT
CONCERN	FRUSTRATION IRRITATION ANNOYANCE	SADNESS	REGRET REMORSE	RESPOND
CALM	CALM	CALM	CALM	DO NOTHING

• DEPRESSION, SHAME and GUILT may not seem like energy to move, but they have the same effect on behavior that ANXIETY and ANGER do – they cause people to be more REACTIVE and makes them less RESPONSE-ABLE

The THINK (cognitive) Thermostat

• We can NOT CARE about something, WANT, PREFER or DESIRE it, or think we NEED it, it’s a NECESSITY, and DEMAND it
• We can NOT CARE about something, think it’s UNPLEASANT, INCONVENIENT or UNCOMFORTABLE to some degree, or think it’s AWFUL
• We can NOT CARE about something, NOT LIKE IT, or think we CAN’T STAND IT
• We can NOT CARE about someone else’s or our own behavior, DISLIKE THE BEHAVIOR, or LABEL AND DAMN THE PERSON
• For each philosophical position we can range from “sort of” to “really”

———————————————–  Think —————————————————-

Really NEED NECESSITY DEMAND Sort of	Really   AWFUL   Sort of	Really CAN’T STAND IT Sort of	Really LABEL AND DAMN THE PERSON Sort of
Really WANT PREFER DESIRE Sort of	Really UNPLEASANT INCONVENIENT UNCOMFORTABLE Sort of	Really DON’T LIKE IT Sort of	Really DISLIKE THE BEHAVIOR Sort of
Sort of DON’T CARE Really	Sort of DON’T CARE Really	Sort of DON’T CARE Really	Sort of DON’T CARE Really

The Think-Feel-Do Thermostat Model

NEED NECESSITY DEMAND	AWFUL	CAN’T STAND IT	LABEL AND DAMN THE PERSON	ANGER	OVERREACT REACT
WANT PREFERENCE DESIRE	UNPLEASANT INCONVENIENT UNCOMFORTABLE	DON’T LIKE IT	DISLIKE THE BEHAVIOR	FRUSTRATION IRRITATION ANNOYANCE	RESPOND
DON’T CARE	DON’T CARE	DON’T CARE	DON’T CARE	CALM	DO NOTHING

 

NEED NECESSITY DEMAND	AWFUL	CAN’T STAND IT	LABEL AND DAMN THE PERSON	ANXIETY	OVERREACT   REACT
WANT PREFERENCE DESIRE	UNPLEASANT INCONVENIENT UNCOMFORTABLE	DON’T LIKE IT	DISLIKE THE BEHAVIOR	CONCERN	RESPOND
DON’T CARE	DON’T CARE	DON’T CARE	DON’T CARE	CALM	DO NOTHING

 

 

NEED NECESSITY DEMAND	AWFUL	CAN’T STAND IT	LABEL AND DAMN THE PERSON	DEPRESSION	OVERREACT   REACT
WANT PREFERENCE DESIRE	UNPLEASANT INCONVENIENT UNCOMFORTABLE	DON’T LIKE IT	DISLIKE THE BEHAVIOR	SADNESS	RESPOND
DON’T CARE	DON’T CARE	DON’T CARE	DON’T CARE	CALM	DO NOTHING

 

NEED NECESSITY DEMAND	AWFUL	CAN’T STAND IT	LABEL AND DAMN THE PERSON	SHAME   GUILT	OVERREACT   REACT
WANT PREFERENCE DESIRE	UNPLEASANT INCONVENIENT UNCOMFORTABLE	DON’T LIKE IT	DISLIKE THE BEHAVIOR	REGRET   REMORSE	RESPOND
DON’T CARE	DON’T CARE	DON’T CARE	DON’T CARE	CALM	DO NOTHING

 

Key Points

• We have more control over our FEEL and DO thermostats than we realize
• The key to getting control over our FEEL and DO thermostats is learning to control our THINK thermostats
• Becoming AWARE of and ACCEPTING where we are cognitively is the first step
• Taking ACTION to set our Think thermostat where we want them to be is the next step